Overcoming setbacks in life can define you. They can also make you stronger. There’s no denying I have had my share of setbacks. And when you’re living with a chronic disease like psoriasis, it’s almost like setbacks are part of your journey.
With a new year approaching, I am determined to overcome any new setbacks the same way: with grace, resilience and a strong support system!
I like how Merriam-Webster defines a setback.
A checking of progress. Defeat, reverse. Those words truly hit home when I think of the setbacks I’ve endured. To me a setback can be anything that takes you away from your normal routine.
Many of the setbacks I’ve experienced in my life thus far are things that I was told about, but not prepared for until it actually happened. But ultimately, how I overcame these setbacks have defined me.
Overcoming The Loss of a Loved One
Most people don’t like to talk about losing a loved one. I didn’t either. But after losing both your parents less than three years apart, it’s pretty hard not to talk about it. But this defeated me.
My parents were the kind of parents who gave us everything we ever wanted in life. They wanted to make sure we had what they didn’t have while growing up. But they also made sure of one thing: we always had dinner together. Some people may roll their eyes at this. But having dinners every night was just part of our routine as a family. It was the one time we all got together and really talked about how our day was. It was as if we all took a deep breath once we sat at the table and all was right in the world.
It’s hard not to feel defeated when that’s taken from you.
But I always thanked my parents for that sweet, sweet tradition. Which I still do every night with my husband and two sons.
I am so appreciative of what my parents instilled in me: that one on one, personal interaction is really the only thing you need in this life to overcome any setback. And in a world now where tech seems to take over our daily lives, this never seemed so relevant.
Overcoming Psoriasis Treatment When You Can’t Use It or When It Stops Working
I have had psoriasis for 15+ years and still to this day, it’s not easy. Psoriasis is a chronic, auto immune disease to which there is no cure yet. I have tried everything: steroids, topicals, tar baths, injectables, light therapy and lotions. But it was when I had to stop a psoriasis treatment that I was forced to check the progress of my psoriasis treatment journey – said everyone with a chronic disease.
A little background: I recently gave birth to my second son in September. I was nervous when I got pregnant because I knew I would have to stop taking some of my psoriasis treatment, just like I did with my first pregnancy. Most psoriasis medication is harmful while pregnant or breastfeeding.
I was at a loss of what to do.
But through the National Psoriasis Foundation and their Seal of Recognition program, I knew I had other options. Independently reviewed by a panel of dermatology medical experts and people with psoriasis, the Seal of Recognition identifies tested and trusted products that help people with psoriasis ease their symptoms. To then receive the seal, manufacturers must prove their products meet the criteria established that their product “sufficiently and safely aids in the management of psoriasis as well as submit samples of the product for testing.”
I have a lot of brands that reach out to me to try their new psoriasis treatment products and I’m very particular of who I partner with. They have to have NPF’s Seal of Recognition.
That’s why when MetaDerm reached out to me, I knew it was different. Not only is MetaDerm’s Health System a powerful anti-inflammatory. It’s steroid-free and safe to use every day. It has the NPF Seal.
Now I wasn’t worried that I had to stop taking my psoriasis medicine (MetaDerm is proven safe during pregnancy) or that my psoriasis treatment stopped working. I had other options! I now continue to manage my disease and live a healthy and happy life thanks to companies like MetaDerm.
I truly thank MetaDerm. They have given me the opportunity to open up about what it’s really like living with psoriasis while giving us the tools we need and supports us in our journey.
Overcoming Postpartum Depression
After I gave birth to my second son, I thought I was going to be in that “blissful(yet sleep deprived) newborn snuggle” stage like I was when my first son was born. But something wasn’t right.
When I looked at my son, I didn’t feel happy. I was crying all the time. I wasn’t myself. I got frustrated with him for not napping (does he always have to nap on me?). Then I got mad at myself for getting mad at this tiny human who was trying to figure out this new life. It was hard to connect with my husband again. I was happy with my first born, but why just him?
I knew something wasn’t right. But it couldn’t be postpartum depression. That can’t be me. I’m not depressed. I’m a happy person. I surely DID NOT have postpartum depression.
I started talking to a few friends about how I was feeling. I talked to my husband. I read about it. I wasn’t going to let postpartum depression defeat me.
After about five weeks of not feeling like myself, I called my OB. I cried and cried some more. Then I asked to move my standard six weeks postpartum appointment up because I felt like something wasn’t right with me. Sure enough, I was diagnosed with postpartum depression. I was prescribed Zoloft and have now been taking it for a little over two months.
Now, I am back to myself. I am smiling and laughing at my beautiful baby boy. I am bonding with him. I feel like myself again.
Here Are My 4 Tips For Overcoming Setbacks
- Acknowledge it
- Everyone experiences setbacks. But it’s OK to feel those raw and negative emotions that come with the setback. It’s practically essential. Once you’re able to acknowledge it, you are that much closer to the healing journey or process.
- Once you acknowledge it, then you can begin to accept it. This is when we learn to live with what has happened. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, known for her well-respected stages of grief, puts this into perspective. “Finding acceptance may be just having more good days than bad ones. Instead of denying our feelings, we listen to our needs; we move, we change, we grow, we evolve.” We listen to our needs.
- Ask For Help
- It was only when I asked for help that I truly felt like I was on the road to recovery. Even if it seems scary, hard. daunting, a hassle, then that just means you need the help. Don’t ever think “they are too busy for me.” There is always someone there to ready to help.
- Talk About It
- This might sound crazy, but talking about what you experience brings a sense of relief. You probably have more to say then you think. If talking about it sounds intimidating then write it out. Writing has become a creative outlet for me. I’m able to organize my thoughts first, then talk about what I’m experiencing. You might just find out that you like it *guilty here* That’s how I became involved with NPF and why I continue to volunteer with them. Talking about my chronic disease brings a sense of calm over me. Something I never thought I would say.
What helped you overcome a recent setback? Let me know below, I’d love to hear from you!
This is sponsored by #MetaDerm but all thoughts are my own.
JoniJanuary 8, 2018 at 10:15 pm
You are such an inspiration, Sabrina. Thank you for continuing to bravely share your struggles and what you learned through the experiences. I love reading your posts!
SabrinaDSkilesJanuary 24, 2018 at 3:54 pm
You’re too sweet Joni! Thank you!
Beatriz at mamawonderJune 2, 2018 at 11:07 pm
Great blog Sabrina.Thanks for sharing your story.It’s so inspiration for every women.I could learn a lot about reading your blog.
SabrinaDSkilesJune 4, 2018 at 9:55 pm
Thanks for the kind words Beatriz! Please let me know if you need anything else. Glad you’re following along.